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I KEEP TRYING TO BE GOOD BUT I KEEP FEELING BAD. 

 September 19, 2020

By  Timothy T. Conner

AGAPE GOODNESS

I won’t let the power that raised Jesus from the dead lay dormant in me. 

When you were born again your soul was made alive to God. Sin’s grip on you was broken – forever! See Romans 6. Your spirit and Holy Spirit merged. So consider this: the same power that raised Jesus Christ from the dead is implanted in your soul. 

Ephesians 1:18-20: “…having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand…”

Like a precious inheritance, put safely in the bank. If you don’t draw on it, your inheritance of resurrection life and power sits waiting, unused. You don’t want to be the man who lives and dies with the power that raised Jesus from the dead laying dormant inside you! The very thought should frustrate us! You want to live in greater fullness – that’s why you’re here and that’s exactly what the Fruit of Goodness displays to the world. 

Just like it’s possible to have a Bible and never read it, or memorize passages and never apply them, it’s possible to have this power available and never use it. It’s like your soul has a spiritual “valve” that can open or close you to Holy Spirit. This one valve is where the flow of spiritual growth is opened or closed. It’s the center of the battle between flesh and spirit raging in your soul. The valve is Faith.

GPS CALIBRATION KEY: Anytime you follow selfish desires of un-crucified flesh, you close the faith valve to Holy Spirit. One question can open it back up again and get us back on Agape Trail: 

“Where are You working here Lord, and how can I best join You?” 

Man of God: look in the spiritual mirror, “having the eyes of your hearts enlightened,” until you see the man of power and destiny Christ sees – and release Him! The rest of your life as you journey upon Disciples Mountain is learning to release inside you what’s already there. In the imagery of Disciples Mountain, going “up” is the process of opening the Faith valve and releasing more of “the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe,” into the situations we face. Release “the immeasurable greatness of his power.” Set your true self free.

Many of us were raised with “do good” religion: “If I DO good – I AM good.” 

It’s so layered within us that it permeates us everywhere. The problem is that it’s not true spirituality. Jesus raged against the error of this thinking, emphatically saying, “It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all” Jn 6:63. Righteousness in your power is self-righteousness! This is where the Fruit of Goodness comes in. 

GPS CALIBRATION KEY: The degree to which you give Holy Spirit access, by faith, guided by His Word, is the degree God’s Goodness can permeate and expresses itself through your soul. It goes back to the Faith Valve.

Think of that for a moment. 

The degree to which I give Holy Spirit freedom, by faith, guided by His Word, is the degree God’s Goodness permeates and expresses itself through my soul.

We’ve all seen men raised in Christian community for decades who are mean, backstabbing, faithless, addicted and selfish. You know THAT person. 

Terrible, disgusting fruit isn’t it? That man has been me. Has he been you? 

Man of God, when life cuts, does sinful flesh nature flow out? Or Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control? If we can’t answer FRUIT, then God’s Goodness has not yet fully fruited in your soul. “Do good” religion can’t feed the inner man – where true Goodness grows. 

The Lord says, “Abide in me and I in you and you will bear much fruit. Apart from me you can do nothing” John 15:5. 

Man of God, any time you are trusting yourself for righteousness, you are THAT person: “Woe to you… For you clean the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside they are full of robbery and self-indulgence. You blind Pharisee, first clean the inside of the cup and of the dish, so that the outside of it may become clean also… Woe to you… hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which on the outside appear beautiful, but inside they are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness. So you, too, outwardly appear righteous to men, but inwardly you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessnessMatthew 27:23-28. You must face the spiritual reality – no matter how great or good your deeds look to humans – if not accomplished through abiding in God, responding to His prompting, going forward in His way, at His time – they are zero in the Kingdom. 

See John 15:4-11: “…As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself… neither can you, unless you abide in me…By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples… These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.”

Think of all the “good deeds” you have done begrudgingly, to look good. Let that break you – to the core. Think of all the “good deeds” you have done to truly serve, and look good doing it, praying to ask the Lord to bless and prosper YOUR good idea. Let that break you – to the core. Man of God, any time you are trusting yourself for righteousness, you are THAT person.

Face the spiritual reality – no matter how great your deeds, apart from God, they are zero. “For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life” Galatians 6:8. “It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all” Jn 6:63. 

Outwardly ‘good’ deeds that are actually, “full of robbery and self-indulgencelike whitewashed tombs… appear righteous to men, but inwardly… are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness… and all uncleanness. Jesus warns: “Woe to you…blind Pharisee… hypocrite!” He’s speaking to us too.

Agathosune {ag-ath-o-soo’-nay} the Greek word in the Bible for the Fruit of Goodness, means righteous in the very core of being and life – for the benefit of others. Only Holy Spirit can grow Goodness in the believer’s life.

Man of God: you know in your heart that true Goodness is a spiritual state of “being” – not “doing.” This is burning in your soul. You know it cannot grow by just showing up, throwing some money God’s way and punching the time card of “do good” religion. The Fruit of Goodness is what you are seeking! Its who you desire to be – when no one is looking, when no one gets credit, when no one can pay you back, because its the right thing to do, because its who you are, righteous in the very core of being and life. 

After Abiding Meadow, this is the final section of trail – before the summit. Are you ready? 

  • Submit to Holy Spirit’s leadership.
  • Open the valve of faith in your soul (heart, mind and strength.)
  • Abide.  

< Image: potter and clay? Disciples Mountain? Building the Ark? Fruit inside the man Etc… >

This is the part of the trail where you want the gear you carry to be minimal. The sinful fruit of flesh is fear, anger, bitterness, pride, lawlessness. They leave you hungry and thirsty, weak and distracted, unable to climb. They no longer have a place in your pack. All the gear necessary for self-righteousness is useless at the summit. This is why the Lord sent Holy Spirit! So you could abide in Him and He in you. Brilliant. 

Your GPS (God Positioning System,) finely tuned now, messages: “so now faith, hope, and agape abide, these three; but the greatest of these is agape1 Cor 13:13, and points you to the ridge where all nine branches of Agape Trail come together to take you up Disciples Peak. (Old-timers call it “220,” after Gal 2:20. You’ll soon see why.)

You take off, and soon it begins to feel more like walking down than climbing up. The path is steep but, strangely, gets easier as you go. The air is fresh and clear as you move farther above the ridge. 

The view from 220 is AWESOME!

From this height, all the noise and troubles of the world below seem so… small. Irrelevant? All the contests and conquests – irrelevant. In the valley below, where the battle rages for the souls of men, satan’s fiery darts can’t reach, nor can the wicked taunts of his demons. 

The wind is forcefully strong – but it doesn’t blow over a person at 220, it blows through and feels like a cleansing wash – not wind. It can be “heard” clearly, but there is no “sound.” Everything is quiet. Spirit’s every whisper resonates through heart and mind, touching the core of the eternal spirit planted in you during your creation in momma’s womb. 

The sign at the peak reads, Galatians 2:20. Now it’s clear! This is what all the GPS directions leading up Disciples Mountain were ultimately leading to: “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me” Galatians 2:20. 

    I no longer live. 

    The life I now live, I live by faith in the Son of God. 

It hits you so clearly now: Goodness comes from how great He is in me – not from how great I am – in Him. “Woe to us” who get these reversed! “The Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness, Faithfulness and Self Control…”These alone satisfy. These alone strengthen. These alone encourage, guide. These alone build the Kingdom of Heaven, on Earth as it is in Heaven. 

After a most exhilarating rest at Disciples Summit, you check your GPS for the next destination and it reads: “Faithful Orchard” 1 Thessalonians 5:24. “He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.”

PRACTICE IT:  

When trouble comes to squeeze you hard, what will come out?

Is our response to ask: Where are You working here Lord, and how can I join best You?

Practice this now. Think of a situation you are being tested in. 

Ask the right question.

If a man of God asks almost anything else, he is heading OFF Trail. 

Keep the eye and ear of your heart on your GPS

Whenever you’re not living in the Fruit, the alarm will sound. 

Beware! “Where are You working here Lord, and how can I join You?” 

(Like anything worth doing, we know it will take consistent effort and practice.)

About the author 

Timothy T. Conner

Timothy is known for bringing individuals and groups large and small together with wisdom, encouragement, and vision to connect with God and each other with new focus and energy.

Timothy has pastored congregations since 1990. From 2005 to 2013 Timothy united pastors, congregations, and community groups to learn to see and serve their city with missionary eyes. Twelve denominations and many community clubs, businesses, and organizations were involved and experienced tremendous evangelistic and discipleship impact.

In the years since Timothy has focused his ministry on the practical application of Agape Love through the Fruit of the Spirit. The results have been tremendous as congregations and individuals have experienced greater focus, depth and passion in the spiritual journey.

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